Okay, so I'm a little fired up today and I always feel better after a little writing. There is nothing quite like writing to clear my head. It's the cheapest therapy out there, I'm telling ya! And since none of you who read this blog fall into the following category, I feel like I can go with it.
So I have a little gripe with this world today. Why can't people live within their means? I mean, I get it. Life is tough, the economy's not what it used to be, but I think most people have this feeling of entitlement. Don't get me wrong, I catch myself feeling this way, too. But the truth is, most of us have it pretty good.
I don't own a house. Would I love to have rooms without white walls and neighbors that don't smoke 6 feet from my door? Absolutely! Do I dream of a space to call my own complete with a backyard? Heck yes. Would I love to watch movies from a big flat screen tv with surround sound? Yup, but my circa 1990 television with a depth of 24 inches will just have to do!
Right now we're living within our means... and our means don't inable us to jump into home-ownership just yet or allow us many other luxuries like flat screen tv's... or a Wii... or new couches to replace the 20-year-old set we have now.
We're working towards it, but right now it's just not possible. The hubby and I have tried and tried to cut back and here we are, unable to cut back anymore. Do we eat out? Nope. Go to the movies? Not since 2009. Decorate our apartment? No. Vacations? Those days are long over.
We've actually looked at our budget and determined nothing else can be done, with the exception of $60 for cable/home phone and my $50 monthly shopping allowance. And so we consider it...
And for the most part I'm okay with things. I'm more fortunate than most. And despite my lack of things, I'm really happy.
But occassionally, I'm reminded that while I live within my means there are people that I know that get state assistance (not that I'm against state assistance... as long as it's being used in the way it's intended!) that have more and I mean MUCH more than I do! Nice homes, vacations, big screen tv's, you name it.
I was recently told by someone that I didn't have the right to expect to have nice things when I'm a stay-at-home mom. I get it. We're a one-income home in a two-income world. And I am willing to give up my right to have nice things and, in order to stay home with Ryan, be completely content with "okay" things; with small, but adequate things; with I'll-take-extra-good-care-of-them-to-double-their-lifespan things.
I guess I'm just frustrated that I ever thought it was possible to have those "adequate" things and still live within your means, because so many people that are making the same kind of money as us are living with SUPER nice things.
Which leads me to one conlusion: they do it with tons of debt. And that's what gets me. That on the outside it seems attainable and yet it's really not.
And so I sit here in my 900 square foot apartment, inhaling my neighbor's second-hand smoke as it billows in the window, determined to be happy no matter what.
5 comments:
I totally get where you're coming from, and I have felt this way many times. The only reason we own a house is because we live in small town USA and bought it in foreclosure, lol. Sometimes I miss shopping so badly it's like the feeling is a tangible thing. I know I want to stay home with Kaden more than I want a new pair of shoes, or the dress in that catalog, but it's still hard. Sometimes I think, "I would love to go choose one piece of furniture that I LIKE, and that I don't have to just inherit from somewhere." But then I feel like such a brat, because we're so lucky that we DO have all of that inherited furniture. You know? And while we're on the subject of government assistance when it's not needed, I can not tell you how many times I have come home from the grocery store LIVID after watching someone buy items I could never afford with their red, white, and blue card. I think the welfare system is in need of serious reform (like you, I think it should not be eliminated, just not abused). It's so worth it to make sacrifices to be home, but sometimes it's frustrating (especially when you watch others who don't seem to have to). Hang in there! I will stop writing a book now.
If I can teach my children one thing it will be exactly what you and Nate are doing. All of those people who are living in debt and are okay with it will pay the price someday. Someday all those people living in debt will look back on you and consider you rich (and I'm not just talking about money). I completely understand your whole post and sometimes feel the same way. Love you lots and keep up the GREAT work at raising your little family:)
so true, so true my friend! At least you can feel a little peace knowing that there are lots of us out there just like you...never going to the movies, out to eat, living tight to be able to stay home and raise the kids. At least in those moments of frustration we can know it's worth it!
My sentiments exactly. You take what you get, and you do your best with it, especially if it means having children.
Ummm, there's a law in Oregon, or at least I thought, that you can't smoke on apartment communities grounds. You should look into it. I hear your complaints. I understand them, and completely agree. I am going to start selling some things at a consignment sale for babies to make our family some extra money. We are in the same boat. We do own our own home, but I don't have all the luxuries I would like to have. Those things just aren't necessary, they would just be nice to have. I love staying home too, and wouldn't change it for anything. I considered getting a job on the weekends, but then when would we have family time. I'm happy with the way things are, and if it means continuing to scrimp and save, I'll do it. I just started doing a little bit of couponing, and that is making me feel so much better about money, or at least the money I would spend on groceries. Good luck to you, and if you win the lottery, maybe you could share a couple thousand with me. ;)
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